The Midnight Freemasons: The Secretary's Job Is Never Done . . .

The Secretary's Job Is Never Done . . .

by Midnight Freemasons Contributor

Todd E. Creason

I ran across this amusing meme on Facebook. The author is unknown, but I thought it was funny and worth sharing--it's funny, because it's true.

WILL A SECRETARY GO TO HEAVEN?
Author Unknown

If a secretary writes a letter, it's too long.
If he sends a postal, it's too short.
If he doesn't send a notice, he is lazy.
If he attends a committee meeting, he is butting in.
If he stays away, he is a shirker.
If he duns the members for dues, he is insulting.
If he fails to collect the dues, he is slipping.
If he asks for advice, he is incompetent.
If he does not, he is bull-headed.
If he writes his reports complete, they are too long.
If he condenses them, they are incomplete.
If he talks on a subject in Lodge, he is trying to run things.
If he remains quiet, he has lost interest in the meeting.

Ashes to Ashes
Dust to Dust
If others won't do it
The Secretary must!

~TEC

Todd E. Creason, 33° is the founder of the Midnight Freemasons blog and continues to be a regular contributor. He is the author of several books and novels, including the Famous American Freemasons series. He is member of Homer Lodge No. 199, and a Past Master of Ogden Lodge No. 754 (IL). He is a member the Scottish Rite Valley of Danville, the York Rite Bodies of Champaign/Urbana (IL), the Ansar Shrine (IL), Eastern Illinois Council No. 356 Allied Masonic Degrees, and Charter President of the Illini High Twelve in Champaign-Urbana (IL). You can contact him at: webmaster@toddcreason.org

2 comments:

Scott ShermanJune 4, 2014 at 3:43 PM
It's an oldie but still true. As a Secretary for 15 years I appreciate seeing this again.
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RocketJanuary 16, 2018 at 3:06 AM
After reading the blogs, the feelings really get warmed up.
Resumeyard
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WB Darin A. Lahners

WB Darin A. Lahners is our Managing Editor. He is a host and producer of the "Meet, Act and Part" podcast as well as a co-host of an all-things-paranormal podcast, "Beyond the 4th Veil." He is currently serving the Grand Lodge of Illinois Ancient Free and Accepted Masons as a member of the Committee on Masonic Education He is a Past Master of St. Joseph Lodge No.970 in St. Joseph. He is also a plural member of Homer Lodge No. 199 (IL), where he is also a Past Master. He’s also a member of the Scottish Rite Valley of Danville, a charter member of Illinois Royal Arch Chapter, Admiration Chapter No. 282, Salt Fork Shrine Club under the Ansar Shrine, and a grade one (Zelator) in the S.C.R.I.F. Prairieland College in Illinois. He is also a Fellow of the Illinois Lodge of Research. He was presented with the Torok Award from the Illinois Lodge of Research in 2021.

RWB Robert H. Johnson

RWB Johnson is an Emeritus managing Editor of the Midnight Freemasons blog. He is a Freemason out of the 2nd N.E. District of Illinois. He currently serves as the Secretary of Spes Novum Lodge No. 1183. He is a Past Master of Waukegan Lodge 78 and a Past District Deputy Grand Master for the 1st N.E. District of Illinois. He is the current V:. Sovereign Grand Inspector for AMD in IL. Brother Johnson currently produces and hosts weekly Podcasts (internet radio programs) Whence Came You? & Masonic Radio Theatre which focuses on topics relating to Freemasonry. He is also a co-host of The Masonic Roundtable, a Masonic talk show. He is a husband and father of four, works full time in the executive medical industry. He is the co-author of "It's Business Time - Adapting a Corporate Path for Freemasonry", “The Master’s Word: A Short Treatise on the Word, the Light, and the Self – Annotated Edition” and author of "How to Charter a Lodge: A No-Nonsense, Unsanctioned Guide. More books are on the way

Todd E. Creason, 33°

Todd E. Creason, 33° is the Founder of the Midnight Freemasons blog, and an award-winning author of several books and novels, including the Famous American Freemasons series. Todd started the Midnight Freemason blog in 2006, and in 2012 he opened it up as a contributor blog The Midnight Freemasons (plural). Todd has written more than 1,000 pieces for the blog since it began. He is a Past Master of Ogden Lodge No. 754 (IL) where he currently serves as Secretary. He is a Past Sovereign Master of the Eastern Illinois Council No. 356 Allied Masonic Degrees. He is a Fellow at the Missouri Lodge of Research (FMLR). He is a charter member of Admiration Chapter No. 282 and is a Past EHP. You can contact him at webmaster@toddcreason.org

Gregory J. Knott, 33°

Greg is a founding member and Senior Contributor of the Midnight Freemasons. He is a Past Master of St. Joseph Lodge No. 970 in St. Joseph (IL) and Past Master and member of Ogden Lodge No. 754 (IL), Homer Lodge No. 199 (IL) and Naval Lodge No. 4 in Washington, DC. He’s a member of the Valley of Danville Scottish Rite, a charter member of Admiration Chapter No. 282, Eastern Star and GAO Grotto. He is also a President of the Salt Fork Shrine Club of ANSAR Shrine (IL), serves as Secretary of the Eastern Illinois Council No. 356 Allied Masonic Degrees and a grade one (Zelator) in the S.C.R.I.F. Greg serves as a member of the Scottish Rite Research Society and The Philathes Society. Greg is very involved in Boy Scouts—an Eagle Scout himself, he is a member of the National Association of Masonic Scouters.

Bro. Randy Sanders

Randy and his wife Elyana live near St. Louis, Missouri, USA. Randy earned a Bachelors Degree in Chemistry with an emphasis in Biochemistry, and he works in Telecom IT management. He volunteers as a professional and personal mentor, NRA certified Chief Range Safety Officer and enjoys competitive tactical pistol, rifle, and shotgun. He has 30 plus years teaching Wing Chun Kung Fu, Chi Kung, and healing arts. Randy served as a Logistics Section Chief on two different United States federal Disaster Medical Assistance Teams over a 12 year span. Randy is a 32nd degree KCCH and Knight Templar. His Masonic bio includes past Lodge Education Officer for two symbolic lodges, Founder of the Wentzville Lodge Book Club, member of the Grand Lodge of Missouri Education Committee, Sovereign Master of the E. F. Coonrod AMD Council No. 493, Co-Librarian of the Scottish Rite Valley of St. Louis, Clerk for the Academy of Reflection through the Valley of Guthrie, and a Facilitator for the Masonic Legacy Society. Randy is a founding administrator for Refracted Light, full contributor to Midnight Freemasons, and an international presenter on esoteric topics. Randy hosts an open ongoing weekly Masonic virtual Happy Hour on Friday evenings. Randy is an accomplished home chef, a certified barbecue judge, raises Great Pyrenees dogs, and enjoys travel and philosophy.

Ken JP Stuczynski

Bro. Ken JP Stuczynski is a member of West Seneca Lodge No.1111 and Master of the Western New York Lodge of Research No.9007. Hew currently serves his district as Assistant Grand Lecturer. As webmaster for NYMasons.Org, he is on the Communications and Technology Committees for the Grand Lodge of the State of New York. He is also a Past High Priest in Royal Arch Masonry, Past Sovereign Prince of the Scottish Rite, and a Cryptic Mason. He and his wife are serving again as Patron and Matron of Pond Chapter No.853 Order of the Eastern Star and considers himself a “Masonic Feminist”. As a masonic speaker throughout New York State, he primarily speaks regarding the use of technology in the Craft. Some of his numerous Empire State Mason articles have been republished in Arizona and New Jersey. To aid in his outreach on these topics, he authored “Webmastering the Craft: Fraternity in a Digital World”, available worldwide in softcover and eBook. He also regularly gives his "Astronomical Tour of the Lodge" at various Lodges. Having lifelong interests in world religions, science, and other fields, his degree is in Philosophy with a concentration in Ethics and a minor In Psychology. He has written articles and essays on the topics of science and religion, culture and politics, business and economics, technology and futurism, as well as various aspects of social psychology. Usually, with interdisciplinary contexts, many of these focus on the ideals of intellectual honesty and tolerance in all forms. Having edited and contributed to Books of Transactions as a member of the Western New York Lodge of Research, he is writing a book on Masonic research bodies. Slowly transitioning to writing and publishing, he continues working on his primary business, Kentropolis Web Development, and Design. He works from home, living in Buffalo, New York with his wife and numerous pets. In addition to various community service projects, he is also an independent interfaith minister with hospital chaplain credentials which aid him in visiting Brethren at health facilities. He also enjoys carpentry, martial arts, and beekeeping.

Patrick Dey

Patrick M. Dey is a Past Master of Nevada Lodge No. 4 in the ghost town of Nevadaville, Colorado, and currently serves as their Secretary, and is also a Past Master of Research Lodge of Colorado. He is a Past High Priest of Keystone Chapter No. 8, Past Illustrious Master of Hiram Council No. 7, Past Commander of Flatirons Commandery No. 7. He currently serves as the Exponent (Suffragan) of Colorado College, SRICF of which he is VIII Grade (Magister). He is the Editor of the Rocky Mountain Mason magazine, serves on the Board of Directors of the Grand Lodge of Colorado’s Library and Museum Association, and is the Deputy Grand Bartender of the Grand Lodge of Colorado (an ad hoc, joke position he is very proud to hold). He holds a Masters of Architecture degree from the University of Colorado, Denver, and works in the field of architecture in Denver, where he resides with wife and son.

Phillip Welshans

Phillip Welshans is Senior Warden of Palestine Lodge #189 in Catonsville, MD under the Grand Lodge of Maryland A.F. & A.M. He is also a member of the Maryland Masonic Lodge of Research #239, and the Hiram Guild of the Maryland Masonic Academy. As a member of the Ancient and Accepted Scottish Rite, S.J. in the Valley of Baltimore, he has completed the Master Craftsman programs and is a member of the Scottish Rite Research Society. His interests are primarily in Masonic education, particularly the history of the Craft, esotericism, and the philosophy of Masonry.

Erik M. Geehern

Bro. Erik M. Geehern is currently Master of Goshen Masonic Lodge #365 in Goshen, NY under the Grand Lodge of New York. He was raised to the sublime degree of Master Mason in October of 2019 and since then has served in various progressive chairs along the road to the east. He writes and curates a newsletter for his Lodge quarterly which disseminates education, history, and esoterics. He is also a member of the Grand College of Rites, the American Lodge of Research and the Kansas Lodge of Research. He works in restaurant operations; consulting, and when not engaged in his usual vocation, or laboring in the Craft, he loves spending time with his wife and two children.

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The Secretary's Job Is Never Done . . .

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