You Gotta Buy The Ticket, Man!

by Midnight Freemason Contributor

WB Darin A. Lahners

On August 23rd, I celebrated the Fourth Anniversary of my first date with my wife, Lisa Goodpaster-Lahners.  Little did I know, I would join another secret society when I started my relationship with her.  While the exact qualifications for labeling a group a secret society are disputed, definitions generally rely on the degree to which the organization insists on secrecy, might involve the retention and transmission of secret knowledge, the potential for denial of membership to those who seek it, denial of knowledge of the group, the creation of personal bonds between members of the organization, and the use of secret rites or rituals which solidify members of the group, a belief in charity towards members of their organization and others, and membership which treats each other as equals even though their membership is made up of men and women of every religious, economic, ethnic background.  

When I met her, I was already a Freemason and Odd Fellow.  However, I would become a member of a small elite group of amazing individuals, all of whom are fans of the band: "Pearl Jam".  Collectively, Pearl Jam fans are known as: "10-Clubbers", "Jamily", or "Jammers".  It depends on who you talk to.  While many dislike the term Jamily, I have found it to be fitting because the group that has taken me in are both Fans and Family (Brothers and sisters from another mother).  In any case, I have found that there is a community that shares a lot of qualities with other secret societies.  

While their fandom is not secret, I would say that there is an interview/selection process, there are deep bonds between the members of the organization, I would argue there is the use of secret rites or rituals that solidify members of the group, and that they are charitable towards members of their organization as well as others, and that they treat each other as equals.  I had felt myself undergo a selection process early on when I first spoke to and met her direct Jamily.  I believe that the concert experience for all PJ fans, is a rite or ritual that solidifies members of the group.  They are charitable towards themselves and others, more on this shortly, and their membership (at least the "Lodge" which I belong to) treats everyone with equality.  

My fandom for Pearl Jam started when I first saw them, on October 17, 1991, when they were opening for the Red Hot Chili Peppers at the Duke Ellington Ballroom of the Holmes Student Center at Northern Illinois University in Dekalb, Illinois.  I was two days shy of my 18th Birthday, as I started Uni when I was 17. While I don't remember much of the show, due to the passing of time and intoxicating substances I may have consumed, I do remember thinking they were pretty awesome and energetic. Of course, their debut album, Ten, would take off shortly after that, launching them into the stratosphere of their Rock and Roll Hall of Fame career success, and would solidify my fandom of the band. I would next see them on August 2, 1992, at the World Music Theater while they were part of the bill of the second Lollapalooza tour.  

Unfortunately, I would next see them again live in September 2022, after 30 years.  Regrettably, School, Life, a First marriage, and children contributed to the long gap.  Luckily, I am making up for lost time.  Those of you who are friends on my socials know that I've just finished a two-week period where I have seen them perform in Indianapolis (technically Noblesville), Wrigley Field in Chicago, and the world-famous Madison Square Garden.  At the month's end, I will see them headline two of the three nights of the Ohana Music Festival in California. 

All this is being said because I had a recent incident while seeing them live in Indianapolis that tested my character as a man, Mason, and Pearl Jam fan.  Much like Freemasonry, some people are Pearl Jam fans that are that in name only.  Instead of following the tenets of Brotherly Love which have been laid out for fans by Pearl Jam's lead singer Eddie Vedder; which is a zero-tolerance policy for any shenanigans at the concerts, if he sees them he will stop the show and have those instigating removed, some fans don't care.  Unfortunately, I was the focus of attention for one such overserved fan in Indianapolis. This fan decided he didn't like me much.  I can only assume this because he spilled his beer on my and other fans' chairs, pushed me in the back several times and I believe spit on me. 

I am going to be completely honest, had this happened when I was in my late teens or 20s, I would have pushed him back and we would have settled the matter with violence. However, I have changed.  Because I am a Freemason, I felt that choosing violence would potentially harm the Fraternity as well as ruin my wife's concert experience.  For this concert, we were separated.  While I had a seat in the pavilion, she was in General Admission, or the pit, right at the barrier between the stage and the fans.  In PJ fan parlance, and probably other fan groups as well, this is known as being on rail.  She waited all day for that experience with another member of the Jamily, and someone who was a witness at our wedding, Tracy, and I wasn't going to ruin that experience for her.                      

I'm very cognizant of the Masonic Ring I wear on the ring finger of my right hand.  Much like my wedding ring serves as a reminder of my fidelity to the love of my life, my wife Lisa; the Masonic Ring serves as a reminder of my responsibilities as a Freemason.  So when he pushed me for a second time, I turned towards him.  I wanted to have a dialogue with him, but his inability to speak or stand up without assistance from holding onto the chairs in front of him told me that would be futile.  Sometimes, you just have to turn back around, which I did.  Needless to say, I didn't have the best concert experience, and walking out of that concert, I wasn't sure I would ever see another concert. 

I was angry, frustrated, and depressed the next day. It brought me back to a very traumatic experience as a child where I felt helpless in a situation where I was the victim of abuse at the hands of someone I trusted.  During this time, I was reminded of a member of the Pearl Jam community, one of my wife's close friends who had Cystic Fibrosis and had survived a double lung transplant only to succumb to COVID-19. His name was: Sean Sullivan, or Sully as Lisa and her friends call him. 

Left to Right: Kelly Whitlock, Sean Sullivan, Lisa Goodpaster (Lahners)

Sean was known for encouraging his fellow Pearl Jam community to live their lives and to have experiences, often saying: "You Gotta Buy The Ticket, Man!"  Why he said this is most likely because he had confronted the real possibility of mortality through the hardships and challenges he endured. However, those challenges only seemed to add to his zest for life.  While I don't necessarily know how he might have handled the specific situation in Indianapolis, I do believe that he would have been disappointed if I allowed that one specific fan to ruin future experiences.          

Sean's simple statement embodied the idea of Memento Mori, which while not implicitly stated in Freemasonry, is an underlying theme of our philosophy. One of the main ideas of Masonic Philosophy teaches us that while death is unavoidable, and the only certainty of our lives, we must also be industrious with the finite time we have to live.  We are taught that in our youth, as Entered Apprentices, we ought to industriously to occupy our minds in the attainment of useful knowledge; in manhood, as Fellowcraft, we are encouraged to discharge our respective duties to God, our neighbor, and ourselves; so that in age, as Master Masons, we may enjoy the happy reflection consequent on a well-spent life, and die in the hope of a glorious immortality.  I also think of Sean's charity, as he was heavily involved in championing charitable endeavors for the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation.  He also embodied the emblem of the beehive, living the idea of being industrious and never being contented while our fellow creatures are in want, especially when it is in our power to relieve them without inconvenience to ourselves.  

I believe that Sean had some role to play in his Family getting tickets for Night Two of the Pearl Jam concert which took place on August 31.  Their tickets were in Section 218 (which was Sean's Birthday 2/18), and Pearl Jam played the song: "Smile", at this show, which was the same song dedicated to him after his passing by Eddie Vedder when he was touring with his band the Earthlings a few years ago. 

While I never was able to meet Sean in this life, I feel honored to know of him. His legacy endures.  My challenge to all of you is to live by Sean's words and embrace our Masonic Philosophy as dictated by Sean.  You Gotta Buy The Ticket, whether the ticket is for a concert, sporting event, or vacation, ie: Live your life.  Perhaps if you feel inspired by Sean as I was, you might also decide if you can do so without material injury to yourself, to donate to the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation in his honor. My (and Sean's) friend Kelly Whitlock's fundraising campaign for the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation for Sean is here: https://finest.cff.org/chicago/KellyWhitlockAllForSully?fbclid=IwY2xjawFIRg9leHRuA2FlbQIxMAABHQZnyOhLJyTEpqEPVTe5yjBasbkLcRjBf0-qgID2pE906e6InMXA2oDeRQ_aem_OmOjpXYdcSeQBM5-CDcBMg

"I miss you already

I miss you always
I miss you already
I miss you all day
This is how I feel

I miss you already
I miss you always
Three crooked hearts swirls all around
I miss you all day"

Smile - Pearl Jam

~DAL

WB Darin A. Lahners is our Managing Editor. He is a host and producer of the "Meet, Act and Part" podcast as well as a co-host of an all-things-paranormal podcast, "Beyond the 4th Veil." He is currently serving the Grand Lodge of Illinois Ancient Free and Accepted Masons as a member of the Committee on Masonic Education He is a Past Master of St. Joseph Lodge No.970 in St. Joseph. He is also a plural member of Homer Lodge No. 199 (IL), where he is also a Past Master. He’s also a member of the Scottish Rite Valley of Danville, a charter member of Illinois Royal Arch Chapter, Admiration Chapter No. 282, Salt Fork Shrine Club under the Ansar Shrine, and a grade one (Zelator) in the S.C.R.I.F. Prairieland College in Illinois. He is also a Fellow of the Illinois Lodge of Research. He was presented with the Torok Award from the Illinois Lodge of Research in 2021. You can reach him by email at darin.lahners@gmail.com.