The Boiled Hotdogs

by Midnight Freemason Contributor

Robert H. Johnson

Joining Freemasonry over 11 years ago, I think back about all kinds of experiences. The degrees, the fellowship, the camaraderie, and of course, the goofy stuff too. What goofy stuff you might ask? You know, the stuff we joke about all the time. In fact stuff we've grown to complain so much about, they become internet memes plastered all over Reddit or Facebook.

One of my most favorite of which is below. I have a new favorite every month. 

Somethings I remember about Lodge are totally inconsequential to my overall experience, yet are nuanced memories that pop in my head--sometimes met with nostalgia, sometimes warm and fuzzy feelings, sometimes embarrassment, and sometimes nausea.

The title of the article mentions boiled hotdogs. That's one of those gnarly and nauseating memories. As I recall it, it was a Monday night, a practice night. The new Sr. Warden, an older fellow with a southern flair was really excited. He made dinner. He was raving about these "big @ss, hotdogs", he'd bought. I gotta break in here for just a moment because I really like hotdogs. Grilled outside on the BBQ, on the Foreman, panfried--I'll eat a hotdog. Here's my only catch--I only eat all-beef hotdogs.

So, there I was. I was starving, had just finished a ritual practice where I was beaten up about how terrible I was, and I walked into the dining room. I grabbed a mini bag of Doritos (Nacho flavor if you're curious), and there it was. That foot-and-a-half tall stainless steel pot of hot water. An opaque sheen of otherworldly substance floated on the top, only broken by the plumped, bursting, and over-boiled hotdog. Tongs with rust at the hinges laid out on the table.

I picked up those tongs, gave them a few open-and-closes, as any man does before use. They squeaked. I stared at the mist coming off of the hot water, at the pearlescent sheen and those fat, rotund, odious hotdogs floating there. I looked up and locked eyes with the Sr. Warden--his hulking mass, his tremendous smile from ear to ear. He was so proud of this meal. I was proud of him too. But there I was and time stood still. I smiled back. I plunged the tongs into the pot with the apprehension of an 8-year-old boy sleeping over at a friend's house and the family has some god-awful weird thing to eat.

"Nothing But Trouble" The Hot Dog Scene. It's gross. Watch it here.

As a kid, maybe you get out of it. "Oh I gotta run home for a minute." or "I just remembered. I am supposed to eat at home. I'll be back after dinner." But I was 32. A grown man. I had to do it. I looked back at the pot and was able to get a hold of one of these hotdogs. I shook it a bit to get the excess grease sweat off of it. And the flaccidity of it--it just broke and fell into the pot again. I dove in again for a second one. Got it. I didn't shake it off. I just tossed it in the bun, I covered it with mustard, relish, giardiniera, and grabbed a Coke.

I was able to eat about two-thirds of that hotdog. You know when you eat something and literally, the second it hits your stomach, you know you shouldn't eat anymore? Yeah, I did too. I at more of it anyway. I couldn't be rude. He was so proud. So I did it. I took one for the team. I choked it down and thanked the Brother for the meal. As I cleaned the kitchen that night with the stewards, I looked in the garbage can to see what exactly I had just eaten. What did the lodge pay for? What would the members be paying for tonight and tomorrow?

My suspicions were confirmed when I found the packaging. It was an off-brand, made with everything you don't want to know about. I paid the bill for eating that hotdog, and so did a bunch of Brothers. Thinking back in my memories of Freemasonry, that's one I will never forget. That's one of those nauseating memories.

What about you? I know you have a story too. Let me read all about it in the comments. Freemasonry is amazing, but there's some bad stuff too.

~RHJ

RWB Johnson is a Co-Managing Editor of the Midnight Freemasons blog. He is a Freemason out of the 2nd N.E. District of Illinois. He currently serves as the Secretary of Spes Novum Lodge No. 1183. He is a Past Master of Waukegan Lodge 78 and a Past District Deputy Grand Master for the 1st N.E. District of Illinois. Brother Johnson currently produces and hosts weekly Podcasts (internet radio programs) Whence Came You? & Masonic Radio Theatre which focuses on topics relating to Freemasonry. He is also a co-host of The Masonic Roundtable, a Masonic talk show. He is a husband and father of four, works full time in the executive medical industry. He is the co-author of "It's Business Time - Adapting a Corporate Path for Freemasonry", “The Master’s Word: A Short Treatise on the Word, the Light, and the Self – Annotated Edition” and author of "How to Charter a Lodge: A No-Nonsense, Unsanctioned Guide. More books are on the way.

Its Not About the Food

By Midnight Freemason Contributor

Bro. Erik Marks

At breakfast of my first day in the Scottish Rite, a Brother welcomed me and said: “don’t you worry, you’ll make back your dues in the meals…the food is great.” I thought to myself: “I didn’t come here for the meal.” Later the same evening in recounting an amazing day of deep insights and new friends to my partner and sons. I explained with slight dismay of my newfound Brother’s welcome serving. It was disappointing the first fare of the day was the extent of his and my conversational fodder. My spouse exhorted: “Erik. You know this: it is notabout the food!” Light. In her inimitable way, Corinna conducted me with laser precision to the heart of what is my problem, not his: our breakfast banter is my bread and butter.

Food is the metaphor for the nurturing, Love, we never received in our families or denied in our co-construction of society. In every culture, we have traditions, ceremony, and rituals around or about food. The Seder plate has foods with metaphoric meanings. We eat specific foods on designated days to remember aspects of divinity, honor ancestors, and celebrate the ample freedoms we enjoy. We break fasts with specific foods. Certain foods are used as medicines. In traditional Chinese Medicine, Vedic and Tibetan medicinal systems, foods are prescribed for myriad ailments. A doctor with an integrated approach prescribed warmed garlic oil for an ear infection I kept having, along with the standard amoxicillin in case the natural method didn’t work. I never had to fill the penicillin prescription…

Foods are sometimes misused as a substance for emotional management or control. People restrict intake to feel a sense of control over their body. Some over indulge regularly or at intervals in order to generate strong bodily sensation to mask emotion, divert attention from emotion, and create an emotion to manage another. Often, anxiety creates an empty sensation people try to fill or blunt with food. When sad, lonely, or depressed, we use foods that boost positive feelings: chocolate, carbs, fats, and sugars. We use food to fill emptiness and its encouraged through marketing. “I’m an emotional eater…” is a common phrase I hear. This can be a difficult pattern, habit, or symptoms to change since we can’t simply encourage abstinence as we can with alcohol or drugs/substances used recreationally or to self-medicate. Food is essential for life, so other approaches to change problematic eating are needed.

Food has always been a part of Freemasonry—as it has in every tradition. It is both material relief and metaphor. In our second degree, part of our traditional wages. Lodges set aside days of the year or month to serve those less fortunate. We provide meals to brethren with thought and care. Men, cooking or providing for, and nurturing, one another…and cherishing every moment. To be clear, at the core of every meal is not always about the food. The primary ingredient is quite often, Love. I can’t blame lack of coffee the morning of my initiation for the fact I wasn’t ready to ascertain the meaning in my newfound Brother’s gift to me: “Welcome. You will not be taxed or punished for getting what you need here. I’ve felt welcomed and cared for by the fraternity. Don’t worry Brother, it can happen for you, too.” He is getting what he needs for his development through the way he serves and is served-literally-in the Scottish Rite. Who am I to disrupt or disparage his path? 

 I may not see what he gains through the degrees or deserts. I may not need what he needs to be nourished towards perfection. Labor, physical, psychological, or spiritual can be draining and requires sustenance. Just because he doesn’t reflect his experience back to me in an esoteric or philosophic frame does not mean he isn’t affected in the ways I may want for me and would like to discuss. Growth can take time and our path cannot be everything to all men at the pace wethink they need. Nor should we try to be so for everyone. It seems we offer a tremendous amount to some; for others our overtly esoteric and philosophic explorations may go unnoticed, for now and we remain persistent. So, the problem is my own. He welcomed me in his way and I missed the chance to engage him: due to my insistence on a particular mode of communication, we both lost out…or maybe it was only my loss. Thank you, Brother. I hope to see you at the next reunion’s wonderful breakfast.

~EM

Brother Erik Marks is a clinical social worker whose usual vocation has been in the field of human services in a wide range of settings since 1990. He was raised in 2017 by his biologically younger Brother and then Worshipful Master in Alpha Lodge in Framingham, MA. You may contact brother Marks by email: erik@StrongGrip.org

A Little Get-Together

by Midnight Freemason Contributor

Steven L. Harrison, 33°, FMLR

Left to right; Steve Harrison, Greg Knott, Todd Creason, Darin Lahners

Each year in May when I make my annual pilgrimage to the Indianapolis 500 – a near-religious experience – my journey takes me through the Champagne-Urbana, Illinois region. There, in recent years, I've taken that opportunity to meet with friends from the area. We have lunch, share the experiences of the past year, exchange ideas and maybe even tell a tall tale or two. Freemasons all, the conversation usually has a lot to do with the state of the Craft, whether in our local lodges or with other Masonic issues in general.

Our small group consists of Todd Creason, Greg Knott, yours truly and this year, for the first time, Darrin Lahners joined us. While Freemasonry struggles with membership issues, our exclusive “order” has grown by 33%.

Todd is the founder of the Midnight Freemasons blog. He has written a slew of books on Freemasonry including three novels where some of the characters are Brothers, and has been named a Fellow in the Missouri Lodge of Research. Greg is a Past Master of St. Joseph Lodge 970 in St. Joseph, Illinois and is a director of the prestigious Masonic Society. Darrin just served as Master of St. Joseph Lodge 970 and this coming year will be Master of Homer Lodge 199. Darrin has written about some tough issues he faced as Master this year and the fact he's out to do it again at Homer emphasizes his dedication to the fraternity. That doesn't even serve as a “Reader's Digest” version of what these men have accomplished. Their full biographies can be found at www.midnightfreemasons.org/.

These Brothers are so dynamic, enthusiastic and have had so many successes I'm sometimes surprised to find they run into the same issues I encounter; but they do. We share those issues and try to work out what solutions and suggestions we can in the space of an hour or so.

I really look forward to this little get-together. It's nothing earthshaking. We're not going to solve the problems of the world in the small amount of time we have. Maybe its greatest significance is there are three – make that four guys – different ages, different backgrounds, different geographical regions getting together. If not for the bond of Freemasonry this wouldn't happen. I wouldn't know any of them and, although Darrin, Greg and Todd work at the same place they wouldn't know each other as well or perhaps at all.

I've seen this kind of thing happen a lot. We are a band of Brothers with common experiences and obligations. Knowing we share the tenets of Freemasonry brings us together like magnets. Just seeing that square and compasses pin on a lapel makes us want to know more about the man wearing it. It's not just a conversation piece; it represents the strong bond of Brotherhood.

This year's meeting came and went all too quickly. We finished our meal, posed for our mandatory photo and went our separate ways. Across the parking lot from the others, I barely could hear one of them say, “Meeting adjourned.”

That is until next year, God willing.

~SLH

Bro. Steve Harrison, 33° , is Past Master of Liberty Lodge #31, Liberty, Missouri. He is also a Fellow and Past Master of the Missouri Lodge of Research. Among his other Masonic memberships are the St. Joseph Missouri Valley of the Scottish Rite, Liberty York Rite bodies, and Moila Shrine. He is also a member and Past Dean of the DeMolay Legion of Honor. Brother Harrison is a regular contributor to the Midnight Freemasons blog as well as several other Masonic publications. Brother Steve was Editor of the Missouri Freemason magazine for a decade and is a regular contributor to the Whence Came You podcast. Born in Indiana, he has a Master's Degree from Indiana University and is retired from a 35 year career in information technology. Steve and his wife Carolyn reside in northwest Missouri. He is the author of dozens of magazine articles and three books: Freemasonry Crosses the Mississippi, Freemasons — Tales From the Craft and Freemasons at Oak Island.